Saturday, October 15, 2005


thanks all for the many delectable treats that have arrived at casa svboob and co.
my fridge runneth over.
i can't fit anything else in there and tucker is going a little nuts with the bounty of leftovers.
pls fill out the fridge availability form at the bottom of this message to check space and delivery times.
ha ha - i mean, just send an email, ok?

i just noticed the dates have been wrong on my posts - whatever.

it's saturday am and i'm experiencing a not-unfamiliar 5 am wakeup anxiety thing. but now i really have something to worry about (compared to the rest of my so-called life). i mean, relatively speaking.

but first a wkly recap:
no pathology report yet -- holidays set them back. will post when i know.

had a ckup w/plastics on thursday in which bandages were removed (ouch! gasp! etc), drain was checked (do you really want to know about this?), and a schedule was established for tissue expander inflation.

translation: "Ya! Ve ar going to PUMP you up"

this part never appealed to me, to say the least. however, i thought that since i was advised against doing the reconstruction of my choice (in short, using my stomach to make a new boob) at the same time as the mastectomy, this seemed like a sensible option. i could save my skin (literally and figuratively) and do the recon after chemo and possibly radiation (the radiation would cook my new "big belly" boob into a hard shriveled mass - i imagine like those weird shrunken heads that i made w/a friend in 5th grade out of dehydrated apples).

the problem is that i HATE this implant thing!

i don't wanna go in every wk and get shot full of saline. i hate needles. i don't wanna do something cosmetic that hurts when i know i'll be doing something i REALLY need - chemo - in a few wks. that will not be so much fun either.
i'd rather have a lopsided frankenstein chest (pls, no disrespect meant to my sistas wit scars) that can just heal and be left alone for a while.
at least, that's how i feel at 6 am.
this may change - so no need to worry. i'm just complaining.
maybe it's also due to the fact that nurse Pam told me to go off the vicodin and onto 9 advil a day. just ain't the same.

[sorry if this is too much info for friends and family - if i'm upsetting anyone. it's therapeutic to write about it.]

but that reminds me of the news the other nite in Pakistan - all these wounded children in a tent w/no water, drugs, etc - screaming. now, THAT, is suffering. not that this is a contest or anything.

So, at the risk of seeming like some kind of martyr ("ooh, isn't she so selfless and brave,") or some kind of control freak ("just who the HELL does she think she is telling me where to put my hard earned dollars!") instead of sending flowers etc., maybe you could consider a weensy donation to a charity redcross or something that is helping out there or in guatemala or one of the many other hellholes on god's green earth.
or at least make sure you have some coins ready Oct. 31 for "trick-or-treat for UNICEF."


Anonymous Anonymous said...

CdA police searching for armed man
A gunshot victim is in a Coeur d'Alene hospital and police are scouring Tubbs Hill for a possibly armed man they describe only as a 'person of interest.' Bryan Lee Doss, 29, could be armed with a semi-automatic ...
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7:08 AM  
Blogger sv said...

does anyone know who the hell bryan lee doss is or why he is now invading my own private blogspot?

or is there some automatic spam connection between breast reconstruction and road construction?

well, anyhow, for all of you who've been wondering how you can exchange free ads on fascinating topics such as private road construction, here you are!

1:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

no idea who that was...i thought it sounded funny because i am so tired...whatever. glad to hear i was not the only one.
love to you girl. i am a sorry sap-no email all week. have to get my own lap top...been so busy working on 3 orders...oi. and there was the lovely leak in my living room. oh, how i love the rain. not. never liked the rain. makes my body ache and my roof leak!
i will come into the city monday night to do errands tues. i might be free in the afternoon-late afternoon. will email when i know more. much love to you, tuck and the girlies. xxoo maria

7:16 PM  

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